Friend Zone of Death

I was sitting at Denny’s at 4am after love making with an awesome girl that I had number closed in July of 2011.  I got her number then but was only in town for a week because of my high school reunion so I wasn’t able to hang out with her until now due to logistics.  Thank Facebook and my aesthetical physique pictures for keeping us in touch.  It is not advised as a rule of thumb to wait this long for a Day 2 haha.

I clearly remember the approach back then, it was an awesome.  I shouted her down as she was walking into the bathroom.  We talked for a bit but she really had to go so my friend and I waited for her and her friend to use the bathroom and come out.  The conversation was great, she knew sign language and a story behind why.  It was one of those interactions where you actually learn something and you are enthralled by the conversation itself.  You run into so many lame sets were girls are absolute retards that a set like this is so refreshing.

Post coital conversations over food are the best.  They are the chillest most genuine conversations ever.  After everything is done and done, you just end up being yourself.  There must be some sort of brain chemical released that makes you uber relaxed and chill.  This is also the time when girls open up and tell you their past relationships and all the lame dudes they met.  We were telling stories of dating and what our criteria for selection were.  She told me her criteria were:

1. No body hair
2. No snoring
3. No drugs
4. Takes care of himself
5. Family oriented
6. And a great cook…..

She had told me that she had a personal chef for a year and a half.  I asked how much she paid and she said “nothing”.  It was a guy friend who had cooked for her every day.  I told her that no guy would ever do that unless they were sexually interested.  I asked her if he had ever tried to kiss her and she said yes during parties when they drank but she would just laugh and push him away.  When she broke up with her bf, she would call this guy and he would put his phone in his pocket so she could fall asleep to his phone.

My god, this dude cooked for her for 1.5 years! That’s 18 months!  That’s 550 days!!   I had been with her for 1 day before we got intimate.  If that dude had learned cold approach for 1.5 years, it still would have taken less time!  You can’t really blame the girl, the dude offered himself.  Poor guy.

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