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Stop Asking Girls for Advice

What do I mean by this?  It doesn’t mean if your boss is a female, you should tell her to fuck off.  It doesn’t mean if your Engineering professor is female, you refuse to do your energy and mass balance homework.

What I mean is… stop trying to learn serious things from a girl that you just opened… ESPECIALLY IF ITS RELATED TO SELF IMPROVEMENT!  You end up sounding like a herp-a-derp potato and seriously ruin any possible attraction and destroy your set.   I used to do this when I was starting out too so don’t feel too bad.  I will give you some examples.

Example 1
You meet a girl who is an image consultant / fashion designer and you think its a good idea to ask her how you should improve your look and how you should change your fashion up a bit.

What shes thinking: “Now that you mentioned it, you do look like shit.  Good job looking like shit bud, keep it up!”
What shes likely to tell you: “I dunno, you look okay, just be yourself”
What you actually learned: ABSOLUTELY NOTHING
What you should have done: Subscribe to GQ, go to a high end store like Neiman Marcus, hire an image consultant, or ask a friend with good fashion.

Example 2
You meet a fitness girl and you think its a good idea to ask her about what types of exercises you should do.

What shes thinking: “Do you even lift bro?  Definitely not alpha male genetics; do not want”
What shes likely to tell you: Probably something stupid like Crossfit
What you actually learned: ABSOLUTELY NOTHING
What you should have done: Talk to Squattincassanova, hire a trainer, sign up for gym, do some research on the internet.

(When I meet a fitness girl, I tease her about her rough hands, or tell jokes that my friends on bodybuilding.com said, or I relate to her.  I’m not talking with the intent of learning anything from her.  As far as I am concerned, I am the pinnacle of fitness perfection even if in reality, I have a lot of improvements to make such as upper pecs, rear delts, hamstrings, etc, etc)

Example 3
You meet a girl who goes clubbing a lot and you don’t know much about venues so you ask the girl about her opinions and advice on whats cool around here.

What shes thinking: “Wow strong home-body, you don’t look like you go out much; newb”
What shes likely to tell you: “It depends on what you like.”
What you actually learned: ABSOLUTELY NOTHING
What you should have done: Yelp, go on the internet, study your venues, go on forums, ask Squattincassanova about which clubs are good.

I actually see this a lot about example three when I take students out to do day game in Vegas.  They inevitably bump into locals since they tend to be single girls running around in the malls because they usually work there, on lunch break, or just grabbing something quick.  If you’re not from Vegas and they are from Vegas, don’t talk about the same boring stuff that they already know and seen a million times.  Talk about where you’re from because that’s probably way more exciting.  She would much rather hear you talk about Venice Beach, or Pike Place Market, or Times Square than whats on the Vegas Strip.

Ultimately you opened them, its your job to be interesting.  Talk about stuff that you KNOW that she doesn’t because that’s what being interesting is all about.  If I meet someone from LA, I will talk about Seattle stuff.  If I meet someone from Seattle, I will talk about LA stuff.  I might tell a joke or tell a few quick things about where they are from to build some rapid rapport but I am definitely not going to blast away with a question stack hoping to learn shit.   When I ask questions in the beginning, its because I usually got a follow up story behind my question (putting the spot light back on me).

If you really want to learn something about a topic that was brought up in set, jot it down on Evernote app via phone and then go research it when you get home.

Obviously, its okay to ask some questions… especially during the rapport building phase.  Just don’t get in the habit of asking these questions frequently if the girl isn’t already into you.  Self improvement should be a secret.  Keep it a secret between like minded people.  Work on it with other people sharing the same goals.  Don’t blast it to the general public.  Nobody cares.  Do you ever see Naturals talk about their setbacks and problems?  Never.  It always appears they are happy with everything in life.