Implementing Observational Openers

These are my personal favorite type of opener and I use these most of the time. How they differ from the traditional direct like ‘Hey I know this random but I think you’re cute…” is they are way more spontaneous in nature. As a result not only do you get points for having the balls to open in the first place; the girl also recognizes that you came up with the witty opener on the spot and didn’t just used a rehearsed line she has heard dozens of times that night.

Obviously when using this type of opener you need to be reasonably creative because your opener is based off what you are seeing in that present moment and your brain needs to make that connection. Additionally this allows you to be more present in the interaction and not just be mindlessly reciting lines.

A bad observation is simply saying ‘you are wearing a black dress’. Alternatively what you should be saying is “That’s an elegant black dress… I’m not usually impressed by black dresses cause 80% of girls are wearing one but your one looks pretty badass” follow up with “I feel like black dresses are like the white button up shirt equivalent for guys… one girl wore it once and it looked good and now everyone does it…”

Why an opener like this is good is that it not only is it creative but it also says something you like about her that isn’t to do with her physical attractiveness. You are complimenting her fashion choice, girls love fashion. Additionally you are slightly teasing her that the black dress is basic as fuck but she is lucky cause the black dress she is wearing is elegant. An observational opener like this initiates banter and gives her an emotive spike right off the back.

Your observations are not limited to just talking about how the girl is dressing. Next time you see a girl observe her, look at how she’s holding her drink, her body language, an action that she just did or how she is dancing. Through this stimulus, think about the signal that she is giving off to you. What vibe is she giving off? How does she compare to others? Is there something funny or amusing you can compare her to?

Practice this over and over, at first you will possibly be uncalibrated and might say the wrong or weird thing that will cause her to respond in a negative way. Sometimes your delivery will be off and you may make your statement seem more creepy or dry than it really is. Keep practicing and eventually your observations will be perceived as fun and the girl will think you are witty and not just saying the same thing as every other guy.

The good thing that students get to experience when they take a coaching program with me is I constantly come up with openers they can use during the night and once I’ve done this enough times they gradually get the feel and in time they come up with their own unique openers.